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26 June, 2008

Ordering Pizza in 2020









Operator : " Thank you for calling Pizza Hut. May I have your.."

Customer : " Hello, can I order.."

Operator : " Can I have your multipurpose card number first, Sir?"

Customer : " It's eh.. hold on.. 6102043338-45-54610"

Operator : " Ok.. you're ... Mr Singh and you're calling from 17 Jalan Kayu. Your home number is 40942X66, your office 7X452302 and your mobile 014-2XX2566. Which number are you calling from now Sir?"

Customer : " Home! How did you get all my phone numbers?"

Operator : "We are connected to the system, Sir"

Customer : May I order your Seafood Pizza.."

Operator : " That's not a good idea Sir."

Customer : "How come?"

Operator : " ACcording to your medical records, you have high blood pressure and even higher cholesterol level, Sir!"

Customer : " What?,.. What do you recommend then?"

Operator : " Try our Low Fat Hokkien Mee Pizza. You'll like it"

Customer : " How do you know for sure?"

Operator : " You borrowed a book entitled 'Popular Hokien Dishes' from the National Library last week Sir."

Customer : " Ok, I give up.. Give me three family size one then, how much willthat cost?"

Operator : " That should enough for your family of 10, Sir. The total is $49.99"

Customer : " CAn I pay by credit card?"

Operator: " I'mafraid you have to pay us cash, Sir. Your credit card over the limit and you're owing your bank$3720.55 since October last year.That's not including the late payment charges on your housing loan."

Customer : " I guess I have to run to the neighbourhood ATM and withdraw some cah before your guy arrives"

Operator : " You can't Sir. Based on the records, you've reached your daily limit on machine withdrawal today."

Customer : " Nevermind ust send the pizza, I'll have the cash ready. How long is it gonna take anyway?"

Operator : " About 45 minutes Sir, but if you can't wait you can always come and collect it on your motocycle.."

Customer : " What "

Operator : " According to the details in system, you own a Scooter, .. registration number..B3337BZ

Customer : " $%#@^^%^#"

Operator : " Better watch your languange Sir. Remember on 15th JUly 1987 you were convicted of using abusive languageto apoliceman..?"

Customer : [Speechless]

Operator : " Is there anything else Sir?"

Customer : " Nothing.. by the way.. aren't you giving me that 3 free bottles of cola as advertise?"

Operator : " We normally would Sir, but based on your records, you are also diabetic... "

^%&*^$&*^$*#%$*(^&*... ..

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